Club-bing

First things first.. BELATED HAFI BIRTHDAY MOTHAH... I am wishing that you minimize your screaming sessions because ya'll know it's not nice.. Hehehe :D Have a longer life.. <3

Today was a open house thingy for the different clubs in our school. The clubs will be more active this year because we are applying for PAASCU. Okay.. enough with the school lingo. So I joined as much clubs as possible. Well.. of course.. to have more points and extra-curricular activities :p I joined four clubs.

*The Lector's Guild - Lectors during mass.. obviously
*Speech and Dramatics - Since I wasn't qualified for our school paper, I am convinced that I am a better speaker than a writer.
*Designer's Club - Im not quite sure why I joined. Im not even good at drawing. But.. I love Art and I sort of have a creative mind so I guess those are the reasons why I applied.
*Student's Assembly Organization - I decided to run as the secretary of the third year class organization. I was having second thoughts of joining since I lost in the previous year.. but heck, I will give it a try.. again.

I hope I will be able to manage my time wisely. I just hope so. Anyway, my last post was so ironic. I want to delete it but it was a good post I guess. Lets just pretend nothing happened. Okay?

And btw, never mind the-judge-my-talent-through-my-posts thing. Its pure crap.

The feeling of feeling like crap

As a follow-up to my ironic incident last Saturday (about my last post).. I am very happy to say that I didn't get in. Yaay. Please congratulate me. Oh..whatever.

It feels awful pitying yourself. Yes. That is how I feel right now. I feel stupid and a useless bitch. Excuse the attitude but that is the truth. Considering what happened today, I think this day will go to the records of the worst days ever. I can definitely remember every single detail. Our school paper head was announcing the fortunate people who will be the staff and editors of our effin school paper . She was down to the least positions and my f*ckin' name wasn't called yet. I was shaking and my hand were clammy. And the moment has come... she called my name and Sophie's and told us that she's sorry but blah blah blah (you know what happened next). Everyone stared at us with a look of pity. I faked a smile of course. I hid my emotions that my throat started to hurt. It may sound like an over reaction but i felt like collapsing to tears. My eyes wanted to shed tears so badly but I held them back. It was very hard. And no way in hell did i liked it.

She mentioned that we can still be contributors and our names will appear on the paper to give us some credit. Hello?? What was she thinking? What she said definitely didn't help me feel better. It was like what we call a consuelo de bobo. Like a consolation prize for a loser. My spirit was crushed and my pride was torn into pieces. I tried to put them back together by thinking that their missing out a great writer but I just felt like a liar to myself. I feel very bad. Self-pity...shiit..

I keep on questioning if whether or not I deserved to be in this situation. I can't blame anyone else but myself. It was me who was mentally blocked and allowed stupidity to take over. Remembering what happened makes me cringe and feel like barfing. It was so embarassing. I mean only the two of us were not qualified.

The only thing that makes me still want to go on is the fact that when I inform people that I wasn't qualified, they wonder why. At least other people recognize my talent :p I am not bragging or anything but if I deserve to get in. It is just a matter of chance. Perhaps the folks who got in was very interested with the topic that their ideas overflowed. Maybe it just wasn't meant for me. Evrything happens for some crappy reason.

Basta... my time will come. You'll see.

ps.. don't I deserve to get in? judge my talent by my blog and read my past posts. Leave your answer on my CBOX. xoxo

The stupidity of Charisse

Oh my fuckin' gash!! We just had the screening for our school paper and i totally messed up. Hello?? Like what's wrong with me? The topic was really easy. What qualities should a youth posses in this moderntime? But I was in an OFF mode. I was experiencing those crappy block outs. God.. I am so stupid. I wrote one hell of a piece of crap.!! I am so sure that Im not going to get in. Well so much fror being a staff member :'C If i dont get in, its there loss not mine. haha. :p

Anyway, I am happy because my study habits are progresssing. YAAAY.. I even study even there is nothing to study.Nahaha. It feels good to realize that yourself is improving. Oh.. and by the way have I told you that I sleep not past 12 midnight? I sleep at around 10:30 to 11 pm since school started. I feel good vibes towards this new school year. I just hope that my vibes are right. (Usually, my vibes are never right) Another thing, I also eat healthy. For the past 5 days, all I eat for breakfast is quaker oatmeal :D There is nothing much to blog about. So I'll say goodbye now. Tootles.!!

First Day Fuck

Okay, okay.. I know I shouldn't be blogging right now because school started and I should be serious but heck.. whatever. All we did today was clean our very clean and dust-free classroom and meet the same shizzy faces all over again. There are ALOT of changes. ALOT. Our subject periods will last for 1 freaking hour. 1 hour!! My Gash! I could barely last a 40 minute class and now... haay. Our classroom location also changed. We are now on the second floor. Yes. We are away from civilization.Uh-huh. On the brighter side, I will shed some pounds from climbing the stairs.

But the whole thing is not that bad. Well at least I think it is. Actually, today was a good day. Probably the best first day I ever had. I used to hate first days but I kinda liked this day. I laughed alot and had a fun time with friends. Especially Luigi...which is our Chairman.haha. :P I am just hoping that everything will fall on their places. Well... actually not really. Because If everything will fall on their places, I will still be rank 20. (Yes, i think that's my proper place) And I so do not want that place. Its Hell!! So I will just hope that some things will fall on their proper places AND some won't. YAAAAY!!

I promise (ehem) that I will be in the top 10. Oh yeah I will be. Go Bitch!!!

School jitters

Unfortunately, (with a little bit of fortune) the day after tomorrow will be the first day of school. It’s the big day. And probably the loudest day of the whole school year. I can already imagine how the day will go. People here and there will be screaming excitement at the reunion with their friends and have the adrenaline rush of it all. I plan to be fashionably late and create a grand entrance to make a first impression. Is that right? Hahaha. No. Seriously. I want to be a bit late so when I arrive, I won’t be looking for my friends since everyone is already there. Yaay. I don’t want to wait, you know.

I am not that thrilled to be in school again. But I'm used to the thought that sooner or later, I will be stuck in a classroom so might as well be open to the idea. whatever. Wait, what attitude is this?? I want to be in school!!! ... and study..er.. and stay up late studying... uhm.. do assignments and be frustrated. YAAAY! Back to school..Back to school..Back to school.

Seriously, I will do good this school year. Just read my past post entitled I am a tough Chick.
I wrote there all my plans and goals. Because you know, I really have to be goal-oriented. Alright. That's it. Till next time... if there is a next time.


PS. What will I miss most from summer??
My sister Abby. I spent most of my time with her and did what sisters do.Hahaha. I'll surely miss our sharing of ideas and 18 year-old talks. Love ya biatch.

Eerie Silence

I couldn't stand this effin silence that is so creeping into our empty house right now. Yes. I am alone at the moment. Eating bread smudged with melted butter and lonely. I am very bored. I have nothing to do. The Queen of Mouths (my mother) is currently in Manila.My other sis and pop are my only companions. I don't even think I can call them companions since they don't talk. As if the three of us are invincible. Andrea's texting all the time and Papa's snoring most of the day. I tried to call my friends but sad to say their not home. Man. Why is everyone leaving??

To make things worse, I couldn't sleep at night. Hello?? What the hell is wrong with me? Maybe I have insomnia or something. I tried to sleep early last night (around 10pm) to train myself to discontinue being nocturnal but I just can't do it. It is very hard to change your lifestyle just in a snap. I mean I am a night person and definitely not an early bird.

I could not believe I am going to say this but... I want to go to school. I am so bored at home and just want to do something instead of just sleeping and eating.

Speaking of school, this coming days, I will file a leave of absence. Yep. I may not be able to blog that often. I am just going to give updates and blah blah. Well, that is if you care.

Not so fairytale ending

Oh my freaky golly!! I am so pissed at Sky Cable. I mean I conditioned my mind to relax last night and enjoy PBB Big night but what the heck?? All I can see on TV were effin gray sparks or what you call it. Thanks a lot Sky Cable. All I can say is .... uhm.. never mind. (too profane)

My sister's left a few hours ago. With a heavy heart I bid farewell. Pat and I are chatting right now. Talking about something.

Oh WAIT!! I know something. I know Mikee's blog. Yeah. That guy from PBB. Anyway check it out!!!


www.meltingpen.blogspot.com

oops.. sorry Mikee. I am just a gossip queen.

Fillin' up the spaces

Okay, considering the fact that I made a horrible horrible post this morning (yes, the one you see below entitled "Dont Say goodbye. Say Goodnight") I will fill up my stupidity by giving you very good meaningful song lyrics courtesy of www.lyricsmansion.com . It's the song Breaking Free from the Disney movie High School Musical. I first heard it over the radio. The singers are not-so-good singers. I even thought the woman in the song was Hilary Duff. Yeah, It was that bad. Sorry Hilary. Anyway, read it.


Breaking Free

Were soaring.. flying .There is not a star in heaven that we cant reach
If were trying so were breaking free
You know the world can see us in a way that is different than who we are
Creating space between us til were separate hearts
But your faith it gives me strength.Strength to believe

Can you feel it building like a wave the ocean just cant control
Connected by a feeling in our very souls
Rising til it lifts us up so every one can see

Ohhhh running
Climbing to get to that place
To be all that we can be
Now is the time
So we are breaking free

More than hope
More than faith
This is true
This is fate

And together
We see it coming
More than you
More than me

Not a want but a need
Both of us breaking free.


Aww. I just love it. Anyway, I don't know how life would be now that Andrea and I are the only ones left. It's just depressing. Especially that I bonded very much with Abby. We're homebuddies. Everything is not what it's used to be. Yeah. Change is definitely inevitable.

Don't say Goodbye. Say Goodnight.

Currently listening:
Island in the Sun by Weezer


Today I'll be saying goodbye to my sisters. Specifically Angela and Abby. They'll be leaving tomorrow for Manila en route UP Diliman. I know, It's depressing. But I'm used to it. Used to people leaving me. :'C I'm only joking. The next time we'll see each other will be 138 days from now. Yeah.. I counted it. Well... from four we are now down to two. Andrea and moi are the only ones left here. The house is getting emptier and emptier year by year. Which means more chores for the two of us. Dang. I so want to be in college right now. Have freedom and blah blah.

Anyway, as ya'll notice I changed my effin layout. Finally. I was getting tired of pink. At first I encountered lots of problems with the layout I chose. But my magical powers sorted them out. I know it seems like it's not me but I totally like it. Simple yet Classy. Plus there are no individual links. I used to like those links for the blog item, profile, and archive but the direction of the wind changed and I dislike them now.

Currently listening:
Hips Dont lie by Shakira

Wait, I also have to say goodbye to the PBB Teen housemates. Todays their "fairytale ending" as they call it. Well goodbye folks. Ciao. I will type more later. Promise!

Cut Throat

Surprise,surprise I have a new haircut. But why surprise? Because to those who are clueless, I am a bit scared of haircuts. As much as possible I run away from those nasty scissors. Well, I have been pretty successful in doing so since the last time I hade a haircut was a year and 5 months ago. But everything changed yesterday. I faced it.

The reason behind all these is because of my mother. She always supervises my haircut. You know, telling the hairstylist to make it really short and blah blah blah. So.. I end up in total humiliation. I mean a haircut can change your life. Agree? If you don't, just imagine yourself bald. How would you feel? Hair is indeed our crowning glory.

Anyway, sitting there in front of a mirror watching a person cutting your hair was scarry. Really.
It is for me. I could see the hairstylist cutting big chunks of hair. My heart literally skipped a beat. Half way through the whole process, I felt relaxed and thought that everything will turn out right. But then, the antagonist (my mother) called the salon and told the hairstylist to make it really short. Oh my gosh. I was shaking. Its a good thing the hairstylist is not obedient. Haha.

In the end I have a well... an okay haircut. Not a favorite but its good.



ps. Well, as you actually see... I haven't changed my skin yet. It is just that Im encountering a lot of problems regarding the new skin. Shit. F*ck.

oops..sorry 'bout that. Tootles.