Those feelings sparking again [Im listening to The Scientist by Coldplay..haay..im teary-eyed.i feel that way when i listen to their songs.]


I have a lot of things to tell you.


First of all, I am really happy of what Nadine said on her message on my cbox. I have read it just now and I am smiling, feeling happy of myself. According to her, I am growing up and my entries are more sensible. Wow. The greatest message left on my cbox yet.

Yes, I agree with her. I have [heeeheee] blossomed. This year is what I call my golden year. The rosebud has turned into a full-grown fragrant rose. Well in my case, not that full-grown but i am in the process. Day by day, i discover something new in myself.

I had a talk with a guy friend this afternoon. He has been my classmate since first year. It happened that we talked about myself then and now. He said that i used to be unexplainably complicated and immature. [Okay, not those exact words but close to them] What he said brought back memories of who i used to be.

When i was in first year, i was like a barbaric nomad. I have just graduated from grade school [which my life there was hell] and i had no real friends at that time. I had no personality and my eyebrows were really bushy [im so happy i considered plucking!]. I was a confused fish out of water. Then i met these group of girls whom i thought were my friends. Yes, they were my friends but they turned me into a barbarian. Why? I became a foul-mouthed insecure wannabe when i was tailing them around.

Okay, i feel guilty. They were good friends but i guess, they are not that modest.
What a shame. I was once one of them. I was influenced by there unlikely culture and lifestyle. Shame..shame..shame

Then my second year in high school came. My barbaric friends and i were separated because we were in different sections. I thought that it was the end of the world at that time. Why? Because there is a myth that when your friends are in different sections, your friendship will sort of loose track of the right direction and eventually sink. [I know, really immature and innocent]

But I figured out that i was not happy in their company. So i decided to make friends whom will influence me for the good. Fate favored me and i met my current friends because of a class grouping. These people are familiar to me since we were schoolmates since grade school. But as i have said, my life in grade school was hell so i didnt have the chance to socialize [as if i knew how to socialize when i was in grade school. I was a people-pleaser.].

Okay, so you know what happened next. I met friends who are really friends. We were similar and different but in good ways. For the first time in my melancholic life, i felt secure and happy with my friends.

They changed me. Okay okay..some things did too but they made a great impact.

And i am so happy that i have met them.

Well, it seems an entry supposed to be all about my transistion from past to present became a friendship post. Heehee..

I guess something or someone prompted me to contemplate on my social life now.

Haay..buhaayy.

Now that i am in my third year in high school, i am better..and will be doing better..than ever.

Gees.. i am so cheesy!

[im watching The Devil wears Prada right now. Lets see if its a little better than the book.]